As I continue to mature and my life experiences continue to mold me, I try to be a listening ear for my friends but also a rock for myself. One thing I have noticed can be a true confidence killer,Comparisons!

Whether we believe it or not, despite our current circumstances there is a unique plan and purpose for our life that has been reserved just for us individually.

When you see someone accomplishing something you know you could do or maybe you are working so much that it is preventing you from achieving one of your goals (boy, o boy have I been there!) stay motivated.

Rest assure, just because it is happening for someone else certainly doesn’t mean it can’t or won’t happen for you. IT.IS.NOT.OVER!

Ok, so you may be thinking “It’s so easy for someone to say all that, but how do you actually do it? Trust me I’ve been there, you hear advice from friends and family saying “Just focus on you” or “Don’t compare yourself to others” but seriously we’re all human, it’s in our nature to question why our hard work and effort is going unnoticed. I want to give some advice to help us push through it!

  1. Focus on what you are amazing at: The easiest thing to do is to think of all the negative things about yourself or work ethic or what you feel someone else has that you lack but start by making a list of 10 or more things or traits that are amazing about you (this may be challenging but you got this!). This method forces your brain to think positively and gets you out of that negative rut. Once you complete this list keep it accessible, maybe keep it in your email or on your notes app on your phone so when you are feeling down you can always go back to it.
  2. Get off social media: Gosh, I know this can be a hard one and to be honest before I wrote this I tried to delete the Instagram app and started having withdrawals within 30 minutes! But I bet we can face this challenge together. You can probably think of a few reasons why this tops my list but let me give you some insight as to why.

People show you a perfectly curated highlight reel of how they want you to perceive them, their relationships, their job and more. There aren’t too many people that share when they have cried all day or show them returning their cute fashion outfit because they really couldn’t afford it and wanted to “flex for the gram” anyway. Remember this when you start to down yourself about what someone else “has”. Everyone wants people to believe their life is just fine-all the time, but let me tell you if no one else has, give yourself permission to be real with yourself and others.

If you have to be sad today, be sad! If you have to scream to let out frustrations do it!

Social media can be a toxic place filled with false reality and can cause us to believe the idea that someone else is living a better life than us. But remember, it’s all about perception..

Let’s start a monthly challenge together, every week we delete the Instagram app (or whatever social app that consumes you) for half of the day, the next day remove it for the entire day and repeat. We can journal or keep a log about how this makes us feel, if we could actually stick with it and if our perception of ourselves started to improve because of it.


  1. You are who you are MEANT to be: This is my take away for us to remember. No One else is you which is so cool because that means you have something to offer the world, your loved ones, your job something no one else can, NO ONE!


I  would love to hear if these tips were helpful to you and what your experience was like putting them into action. Let’s chat! Feel free to leave me a comment on this post or reach out using my contact me option.